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Built-in Safety Valve Keeps Wife From Self-Destructing

August 7, 2006 By Leave a Comment

I don’t get enough sleep and neither does Gorgeous.

And if I’m going to be willing to face my O-R then we gotta admit it is a problem entirely of our own making.

We all know there are significant health advantages that go along with getting enough sleep. Google the phrase health advantages of sufficient sleep and you’ll get over 5.4 million sites chock full of those very benefits.

Here are Some Examples

  • Clearer thinking
  • Improve Tolerance to Hot Weather
  • Improved Learning Ability
  • Better Memory
  • Reduce Blood Pressure
  • Lower Risk of Heart Disease
  • Helps prevent Diabetes
  • Fights Depression

Exhaustion Sets InYet in spite of these known benefits most of us still don’t get enough sleep. There’s just too much to do and not enough hours in the day, right?

That’s what most of us think. And most of us would keep going without any break if we could. I know I struggle with feeling like sleep is a waste of time. Why is the system set up so that we need to sleep in the first place?

I really don’t know. But I suspect that if the system wasn’t set up to force us to sleep sometime most of us would simply self destruct.

Did you know that God set up the whole system so that we’d get enough rest in the first place? The Bible says

There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience.

But what if you don’t buy into the whole God thing?

It turns out it doesn’t matter where sleep is concerned. You are going to sleep eventually.

And you might even find that God slows you down before you self destruct. He has a track record of doing that.

Back in Ancient times God devastated the nation of Israel and had most of them carried off into captivity in part to give the land itself a rest. He had told them to give their fields an off year once every seven years and not to plant crops for a whole year. They never actually followed the by-year instruction. So this is what the Bible says about the time they were in captivity

The land enjoyed its sabbath rests; all the time of its desolation it rested, until the seventy years were completed in fulfillment of the word of the LORD spoken by Jeremiah.

Sweet DreamsGod goes through some gyrations to give the land a rest and he does the same thing for us. Gorgeous is struggling with a cold right now. She spent yesterday resting on the couch. And I think it drove her a little bit nuts.

But the alternative of self-destructing would be far worse.

I don’t want what she’s got. But if I don’t start sleeping a little more God may just decide to slow me down and force me to get a little rest anyway.
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The Lesson of the Dog Poop

July 29, 2006 By Leave a Comment

I mowed the lawn yesterday. After being out of town for a while it needed it. As you know yard work is not one of my favorite things. Neither is the heat and yesterday’s high was 99°F. With sky high humidity.

I know it is my tradition to do yard work in the hottest part of the day to compound my misery, usually just because the timing works out that way. But I’d been working down in Jacksonville, FL out in the heat for a few hours already in the afternoon so I decided to wait for it to cool off a touch.

Part of me was hoping I’d get rained out by one of the thunderstorms that seemed to be brewing off in the distance. No such luck.

So I went out into the heat of the evening about 7PM and got busy. I guess it must be too hot for the gnats because I didn’t notice them much.

Now for all my griping about doing yard work, our lawn is really pretty small. Our lot is measured in square feet, not in acres. We’ve got a side walk that runs along the street. And it is only about 21 steps to walk from the curb to the front door.

There are a lot of families with small kids in our neighborhood, which is one of the things that Gorgeous and I like about it. And most people are mindful of their pets. There are very few wandering about loose. The only regular is Mojo, but don’t blame her owners. She truly is an escape artist. And she’s so friendly and hyper that she’ll come running up to you when you call her and either piddle right at your feet or roll over on her back with her tail going a mile a minute. Sometimes she does both. But I digress.

Dog Poop Warning SignAnyway as I got into cutting the grass (really just leveling the weeds) I noticed not one or two, but several piles of dog poop along the front edge of our lawn. Now for me it was not that big a deal. We don’t have kids that will be playing in it. I have a pair of old sneakers that I wear only for yard work, so it didn’t even bother me when I stepped in it. Those shoes never get past the garage anyway.

But I found it interesting that all of the piles were easily within a leash length of the side walk. And that means there was probably a person involved at the other end of the leash.

What do you suppose goes through the mind of that person when their dog is doing his business on someone’s lawn?

“Oh, I’m sure this home owner will be so happy that I am providing free fertilizer for this part of their lawn.”

Or maybe they are thinking, “Whew! Good job Fluffy. At least you didn’t go in our yard where I’d have to clean this up.”

Remember how close our house is to the street? How bold of the owner to let the dog go right in front of a bunch of windows that are so close.

Here are a couple of Proverbs about bold people:

1. The wicked put up a bold front, but the upright proceed with care.

2. The wicked run away when no one is chasing them, but the godly are as bold as lions.

At first that might seem like a contradiction. But I think the difference is in the timing.Sanitary Dog Poop Collection

The first one is talking about before the deed is done, or while it is actually in process. That is often the time when people who are doing things they know to be wrong tend to put up a strong front and try to bluster their way through should they be confronted.

The second Proverb is talking about after the fact when the conscious kicks in. Guilt is a tremendously powerful force. People who know they’ve done wrong are often in fear of being found out. They can even start to get jumpy at shadows. But folks with a clear conscious aren’t worried because there is nothing untoward to find out.

How does that relate to dog poop? Well I wonder how the conscious is treating those folks at the end of the leash.

Some times going ahead and dealing with something unpleasant straight away (like picking up your dog’s poop) is better and less unpleasant in the long run than dealing with the guilt of taking the shortcut of leaving it lie. The trouble is we often don’t see the end results of our decisions. We only see the unpleasantness that is right in our face.

And no I didn’t pick it up either. I figure a little free fertilizer just might be good for the lawn.

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When Plans Fall Apart

July 24, 2006 By 3 Comments

Some days simply refuse to go according to plan. And yesterday was one of those days.

The plan was elegant in its simplicity. There was a church I wanted to check out in the morning. It wasn’t located exactly near my hotel room. But hey, for the first time on this trip I had a day with no work scheduled so why not? Then I was going to head back “home” to the hotel, goof off in the room, write an email to my sister, get some more groceries for my extended stay, do some laundry and catch some dinner.

And the day started off well too. I slept in, drove up to see the church. It took a bit longer than I’d planned. No problem. I planned for that possibility. They have an early afternoon service. So I went to find a coffee shop to hang out and read.

But no plan ever survives first contact with the enemy, eh?

I didn’t even get out of my car at the coffee shop when the phone rang and I got called into work stuff.

So instead of the leisurely day of goofing off I had planned my day ended up involving lots of driving and a trip to the airport to get a rental car.

Ah, well. At least I still managed to get the laundry done and find some groceries (sorry Sis! :oops: )

And then at the end of the day I actually connected with Liz Strauss finally! She made it back to town. She scored me an invite to a party at the Museum of Contemporary Art on Thursday night before I fly out on Friday morning. Talk about a nice way to cap off an otherwise frustrating day!

Old ShipwreckIt got me thinking about how much control we really don’t have in our lives. I mean we can plan for all sorts of eventualities but in the end we just plain aren’t in charge of how things work out.

I wonder what kind of thoughts were going through Paul’s mind the day the ship he was a prisoner on sunk around him, he got washed up onto shore and bitten by a poisonous snake. I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the way he planned for that trip to work out! (You can read about it here in Acts 27:27 – 28:6)

There is a Proverb that says

We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.

And often it works out much better than we anticipated in the end if we only make the effort to look at it through the lens of the long view.

So I’m interested to see what today will bring.

Enjoy!

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Finding Contentment In Spite Of Your Circumstances

July 14, 2006 By 4 Comments

Life on the road is… well, it’s interesting.

There are challenges. Things aren’t the same home. Some of the things we take for granted and simply just do out of habit have to change.

Spilling Coffee PotFor example I haven’t figured out how to pour anything from the little 4 cup coffee pot here in my room without massive amounts of spillage. Fortunately there is a little kitchenette with a sink to spill over and contain the mess.

The cheesy little clock radio in the room only gets two stations across the whole dial for some reason. I discovered I’m really not at all into hip-hop! (Sorry David) Fortunately for me Gorgeous felt sorry for me and loaned me her iPod. I really need a significant music fix throughout the day so I might be going a bit nuts without it.

It can be very hard to be content when things are not the way we would like them to be.

Some people harness discontentment and use it to propel them to make major positive changes in their lives and often in the world around them.

Unfortunately it is far more common for folks to fixate on the things they don’t like in their lives and only use them as a source of complaining. And often it turns into envy of what others have, which can be very destructive. James warned folks about this.

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

Fortunately it doesn’t have to be that way for us. Paul figured out how to be content even when things weren’t the way he wanted them to be. He said

I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.

Are things the way you want them to be? Are you content anyway?

Just a little something to think about on a Friday.

Enjoy!
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How to Get Rid of Stress

July 12, 2006 By Leave a Comment

I’m a little stressed.

I’m getting on a plane in a touch over 24 hours and I have about three days worth of things to do before I can go. I’ve been scrambling furiously to catch up, but I didn’t budget my time all that well. Now I am paying the price for my mistake by shorting sleep and taking on way too much stress. I’m trying to make up the difference with massive coffee consumption.

Paul wrote some good advice to people like me in a letter we have in the Bible that he wrote to some friends. I like the way The Message puts it

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Coffee CupI have to ask myself if I really believe that. Do I really believe that God will take care of my business if I allow myself to stop worrying and ask for His help?

I mean my religious, Christian side would give that advice to anyone else I found in my spot, right? So if I know how to get rid of worry, why do I still keep it all?

Because if I truly believed what Paul had to say I wouldn’t feel this overpowering need to be in control of everything all the time and then get stressed out when things didn’t go the way I wanted them to.

Maybe it would help to listen to some of what Jesus said when he gave his famous Sermon on the Mount.

“So I tell you, don’t worry about everyday life–whether you have enough food, drink, and clothes. Doesn’t life consist of more than food and clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t need to plant or harvest or put food in barns because your heavenly Father feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than they are. Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? Of course not.

“And why worry about your clothes? Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won’t he more surely care for you? You have so little faith!

“So don’t worry about having enough food or drink or clothing. Why be like the pagans who are so deeply concerned about these things? Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.”

Messy DeskYou know, my faith may be pretty stinking puny, and I probably stress because I am not really willing to let go of my control and trust what God says. But I do feel better for having read those words this morning.

For now, it’s time to go to work.

Here’s to hoping your day just got a little less stressful too.

Enjoy!

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Longing

July 10, 2006 By 2 Comments

Today started a bit on the early side for the Cree household. We were up and about by 4 AM to get Gorgeous on a plane to Dallas for a conference that she’ll be at all week. The boys and I never dig it when she has to leave but it is part of life these days. This morning was especially tough.

Usually Gorgeous “bribes” me to take her to the airport by getting me a Starbucks. Then we sit for a while in the terminal and chat before she has to go through security. It give the whole outing a touch of adventure. And since Savannah is such a small airport, I often end up out of there quickly enough that I’m still in the free time for parking.

Plane at JetwayThis time, however, I had to drop her at the curb and head right down to Jacksonville for work of my own. No Starbucks. No hanging out in the terminal. Couple that with the fact that my company is sending me out of town for 10 days before she gets back and it made for a bit of a Grumpy Chris this morning.

The bottom line is that I was wanting something that hasn’t happened yet, i.e. both of us back in the same city. We do that a lot, crave for things that haven’t happened yet.

It’s human nature. There’s a Proverb that says:

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

We are wired to want. Blaise Pascal said it this way:

There is a God-shaped vacuum in every heart.

What did he mean? Pascal meant that we all have a craving of sorts and we try to fill it with whatever we can find to satisfy it. But no matter what we try to stuff down that hole of craving we will always want more. Because it is God-shaped, fashioned into us by the Creator himself. Only by turning to Him can we satisfy that craving.

If you want Pascal’s long (and very deep) explanation of the concept check this out:Plane into the Sunset

What does this desire and this inability of ours proclaim to us but that there was once in man a genuine happiness, of which nothing now survives but the mark and the empty outline; and this he vainly tries to fill from everything that lies around him, seeking from things that are not there the help that he does not get from those that are present? Yet they are quite incapable of filling the gap, because this infinite gulf can only be filled by an infinite and immutable object – that is, God, Himself. He alone is man’s veritable good, and since man has deserted Him it is a strange thing that there is nothing in nature that has not been capable of taking His place for man: stars, sky, earth, elements, plants, cabbages, leeks, animals, insects, calves, serpents, fever, plague, war, famine, vices, adultery, incest. And since he has lost the true good, everything can equally appear to him as such – even his own destruction, though that is so contrary at once to God, to reason, and to nature.

I told you it was deep. Think about it.

Enjoy!

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A Fool and His Anger

July 8, 2006 By 4 Comments

Explosion at SeaGorgeous and I had a little tiff last night. It was about something stupid. It usually is. Last night it had something to do with rearranging offices. Dumb.

We are trying to learn how to fight fair. It’s not easy because we both have the capacity to get pretty stinking angry. We have the potential for a high order explosion if we’re not careful.

There’s a Proverb about anger. It says, “A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back.”

I was pretty foolish last night.

Did you know that the Bible has a whole bunch to say about anger? It mentions it about 400 times. God get’s angry at people. Some of God’s people get angry at Him. And of course lots of people get angry with each other. The Bible tells us that even Jesus got angry at times. I guess God knows how we are as far as that is concerned.

Here’s an anger reference that I find encouraging:

In your anger do not sin.

I’m glad it doesn’t say “don’t sin by getting angry.” God knows we will get angry because it is part of the way he wired us. Even so, he tells us not to sin by allowing ourselves to be controlled by our anger. For example we shouldn’t use our anger to fuel revenge.

And revenge doesn’t always mean some big dramatic Hollywood type thing either. Usually our revenge is simply a bunch of little digs we aim at the offending party to punish them. When we do that we are really hurting ourselves worse than we are hurting them.

The good news for Gorgeous and I is that we each found some constructive uses for our anger. I went out and cut the grass. I’ve shared how much I hate yard work. I figured as long as I was angry, I might as well get it done and not spoil a good mood some other time.Cutting the Grass

Gorgeous went on an organizing frenzy and got her office and most of the rest of the house picked up before I got back inside. When we got our respective projects done, we had a nice dinner, watched some TV and both fell asleep on the pit couch. Neither of us were angry anymore.

Which is a good thing because the next part of that anger reference above says

Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry

And that’s not easy to do some times. Especially when you have an argument with your spouse in the evening. But if you make it a principle to live by, I’m told that studies say you will be healthier and live longer. I guess it is worth the effort.

We didn’t get to Pirates of the Caribbean last night. Perhaps we will brave all the kiddies and go this afternoon.

Enjoy!

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Why Work Is Such A Drag

July 7, 2006 By 6 Comments

There are days when I don’t get excited about my job. And I have a really good job in my industry. It is considered by many to be a career capper, and most guys stay with our company until they retire once they get in.

Today is one of the days that doesn’t excite me. I have to be out at a ship at 0630, which normally wouldn’t be all that big a deal. It’s not like I’m going to have to do all that much physical labor when I get there. Just take some pictures and jot down some notes so I can go back to the office and write a report about it. Actually it is kind of nice to be in a stage of life where I am getting paid more for expertise than for my physical work.

Mostly because I have a lazy streak, I guess.

Pirates of the CaribbeanWell it probably wouldn’t be so bad except Gorgeous and I have planned a Friday night out tonight. We hope to see the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Normally I don’t go to movies on opening night but Gorgeous is going out of town on Monday for a conference and won’t be back until after I leave town for work. So we have a bit of an extended time apart which is enough to prompt us to attempt to fight the crowds tonight. But I’ll probably be a might sleepy because of the early start.

Did you ever wonder why work can be such a drag sometimes no matter what you do?

Would you believe there is an explanation for it in the Bible?Digging a Ditch

It goes all the way back to the beginning. Back to the garden of Eden. When God found out that Adam & Eve had done the one thing that He told them not to do, He threw them out of the place. – Talk about violating the terms of your lease! Sheesh! They only had 1 rule to follow and they couldn’t do it. No wonder we humans are so messed up!

Anyway, as he was walking the kids to the door, God hollered out a curse at each of them. Here’s what God had to say to Adam as he was collecting his belongings:

And to Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate the fruit I told you not to eat, I have placed a curse on the ground. All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorns and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains. All your life you will sweat to produce food, until your dying day. Then you will return to the ground from which you came. For you were made from dust, and to the dust you will return.”

Yep. Basically God said there will be days when you won’t get excited about your job. Lots of them.

I know that doesn’t really help make it any better – no useful job enjoyment tip today. Sorry to disappoint you. But sometimes doesn’t just knowing why something is the way it is make it a little less frustrating?

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Too Much is Never Enough

July 5, 2006 By 8 Comments

Have you ever noticed that as we go through life we get increasingly harder to impress?

Fireworks is one area where I struggle with that. I was on a ship in New York harbor for the 4th of July in 1986 when the Statue of Liberty was rededicated after her two year renovation. I saw the laser beam shoot across from Governor’s Island to the statue to kick off the fireworks display when President Reagan gave the signal.

Fireworks Statue of LibertyThen I saw the entire New York City skyline (complete with the Twin Towers) disappear behind a wall of fireworks. Fantastic. Impressive. Breathtaking. I really can’t find the right words to describe how wonderful it was that night looking over the rail of the ship across the harbor, hearing an entire city cheer at the incredible explosions of color and light.

Compared to that night most fireworks displays are… nice.

Part of the trouble is that I am a child of the MTV generation: Too much is never enough.

Do you struggle with that kind of thing at all? Maybe the words of the prophet Haggai apply to you:

This is what the LORD Almighty says: Consider how things are going for you! You have planted much but harvested little. You have food to eat, but not enough to fill you up. You have wine to drink, but not enough to satisfy your thirst. You have clothing to wear, but not enough to keep you warm. Your wages disappear as though you were putting them in pockets filled with holes!

Left on our own we have an ever increasing appetite for more and more. It makes us ugly. And it never really satisfies.

J. Paul Getty, the billionaire businessman, reportedly answered the question how much is enough with these words: Just a little more.

Our own nature puts us on a gerbil wheel that we can’t get off.

Fortunately for us Jesus offered a way off the wheel.

But the water I give them takes away thirst altogether. It becomes a perpetual spring within them, giving them eternal life.

Imagine getting off the wheel and leaving the MTV generation behind! That idea is worth looking into, don’t you think?

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Speak up or Shut up: What’s the right thing to do?

July 2, 2006 By 6 Comments

The other day I posted a little rant about my frustration when people don’t plan. In the conversation that developed out of that Liz and I got to talking about being able to see when people are about to make some kind of mistake and when it’s appropriate to say something or not.

That is a whole big issue. When do you speak up? When is it none of your business?

These are tough questions with no single “right” answers. And for sure there are no easy answers. Me, I tend to be opinionated and outspoken. My track record includes an obnoxious streak so I try to be more careful these days and weigh out whether I should speak up or not.

Often it is a tough decision. Let me give you an example.

I had a roommate once. He was a really nice guy, grew up in the church. He was in his mid 20′s and volunteered helping out with the youth group at his church. I noticed there was one girl that he seemed to spend a lot of time with.

Now I didn’t grow up in church. I’ve been out there in the world and seen some stuff, if you know what I mean. I’ve learned a little about people. And I saw a potential problem developing for my roommate and his friend.

She was under 18 and to my perspective they seemed to be spending maybe too much time together. But who am I to judge, right? Besides I knew my track record (borderline obnoxious, hey?).

Well it bothered me enough that I went to two separate friends of mine I trusted and asked them discretely for advice. Both of them independently recommended that I not say anything. They said that I didn’t really know him all that well and maybe I was misreading the situation. He might not take to kindly to my view of things and it might ruin our friendship. Well, knowing who I am I decided to go against my own instincts and kept my piece.

You know what happened.

Doh Homer SimpsonAfter I moved out of the house (actually I moved completely out of the state). She ended up getting pregnant and they got married. Now before you get all outraged at him remember he really is a nice guy who genuinely wants to do right by folks. He was however just as naive as she was. Should he have known better? Sure.

If that was where it ended, then all’s well, right? Well unfortunately their marriage didn’t last. I don’t know any of the details other than there were some more children involved before it was over. So now we have several lives that are more complicated than they needed to be.

Hindsight is 20/20 and I should have said something. I regret not speaking up. The whole thing was a powerful lesson to me on the importance of giving advice and I am now more inclined to speak up even when what I say may not be received well. And even when I might be totally wrong and misreading the situation entirely. I guess I’d rather look like a boob than see someone else get hurt.

Here’s a couple nuggets from Proverbs on the issue:

Wounds from a friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.

The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.

But there are definitely times when it is better to keep your peace. Some lessons are best learned by experience. Some of our relationships are just plain not close enough for it to be appropriate for us to speak up.

So here are some things to think about that might help you through this dilemma.

  • How well you know the person versus how serious the issue at hand is. You can think of it as an equation or a scale. On one side put your relationship with the person, how well you know them, the likelihood you can speak to them about a tough subject without them misinterpreting your intentions. On the other side weigh out how serious the issue is. It truly is often better not to sweat the small stuff. If it is no big deal, then shut up!
  • What are the implications and possible consequences of not speaking up? Think through what might happen. What’s the worst case? The best case? How many people might be affected?
  • Is there a lesson that the person probably won’t learn without making the mistake at hand? As much as I prefer to learn from the mistakes of others, the reality is I learn best and fastest from my own mistakes. That’s just the way we’re wired
  • Has the mistake already been made, or is there still time to avoid it. This may seem common sense to most folks. But there are some out there who feel it is their job to point out every single mistake people have made. Telling someone “you just screwed up” is a whole other deal from warning them that they might be about to make a mistake. More often than not, when people blow it, they know it. They probably don’t need you to pick that scab for them.

The bottom line is all our actions have consequences. That principle applies both to us and to them. We face consequences whether we speak up or stay quiet. They face consequences for whatever choices they make, good or bad.

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