There are some mornings when I feel particularly violated by the alarm clock. This morning was one of them. There I was minding my own business, blissfully unaware, and suddenly I was smacked upside my consciousness with some radio announcer. I was too groggy to make out the words but it seems like he was saying something about finances. A double whammy.
Usually it feels a little less hurtful if it goes off in the middle of a song so the first thing I hear is music. Somehow that brings me around a little more humanely than having someone talking at me even before I awake. I mean even if my work cell rings in the middle of the night, at least it has the courtesy to give me a heads up before someone is talking to me. (I wonâ€™t go into the years I had a Nextel and would get walky-talky calls in the dead of night. Iâ€™m glad thatâ€™s in the past!)
Iâ€™ve lost the option of the snooze alarm too. Smokey, our Low-Rider kitty, is always there to pounce on me the moment he hears that alarm go off. And then he plays the Jump-on, Jump-off game until I get up. Itâ€™s an effective tactic. I usually end up out of bed in about a minute. I still dream about the days when I could hit the snooze button and get a full 9 minutes in. Sometimes I even hit the snooze button so fast I wouldnâ€™t actually wake up until 9 or (oh, yes) 18 minutes after actually I set the alarm. The beauty of that was it was an automatic extra snooze situation because I would think that it was earlier than it actually was. (I know, that’s a lot of wases for one sentance first thing in the morning.)
Those days are gone, thanks to Low-Rider. And just to make the morning complete I should note that he has the uncanny ability to hit my bladder more times than not. (Iâ€™d give him a bladder accuracy ratio of about 65%.)
I used to resent those folks who wake up quickly and have a smile ready to go as soon as their eyes are open. Now I am just amazed by them. My Gorgeous wife is one of those weird morning people whose most productive time of the day is before lunch. I sometimes envy her ability to function so well so soon out of a sound sleep. I usually try to give myself an hour or two head start so that weâ€™ll be somewhere near the same plane of civility when she gets up. Of course that approach means that by the end of a given week Gorgeous has about an extra whole nightâ€™s worth of sleep on meâ€¦
I mean why do we even have to sleep anyway? Wouldnâ€™t it be a much more efficient system without sleep? How much more could we get done in our lives if we didnâ€™t need sleep? Think about it. If the average person sleeps 8 hours a day (what the medical people recommend) then by the end of the year weâ€™ve slept for about 4 months. By the time weâ€™re 65 weâ€™ve slept for nearly 21 years! How much could we accomplish if we didnâ€™t need so much down time?
I donâ€™t get it.